ASK BUBBY – New Column (funny!) -Retired Couple

*Dear Bubby,

My husband and I both retired two years ago. He was an engineer and I worked for the government.

All my life I have wanted to go on a cruise but children, work, and the daily routine of life have kept me back from that dream until now.  So after two years of us vegging in front of day-time tv, I believe that now is the time to achieve that dream, and sail!

However, apparently my dream was not my husband’s dream. Ever since we retired he has been counting the pennies, even going so far as to check the grocery bills. His dream is to pass on our money to his children (he was married before and has 3, we have none together) as he wants the money we have earned over the years to go to good use. He believes that a cruise is too expensive and that he will compromise by buying an above ground pool that we can put in our backyard and use during the summer season.

One problem is that we live in Alaska so the summer season, or the time we can sit by the pool, is limited. In addition I am confined to a wheelchair and would need a crane to get me up the ladder into it, which he might need also, as since he left work he has gained almost 100 lbs.

Please tell me if I am wrong in wanting to get this little enjoyment in life.

Sincerely, Anchors Aweigh

Dear Aweigh,

I admire your husband in wanting to get good value for his (and your) savings. I would tell him that from my experience the first thing his children will do with the money he leaves them is to go on a cruise, so if the ship line is going to get the money anyway it might as well be from you (both).

You mention your husband is an engineer. I have always believed that you speak to a child in the language they understand. Men are just little boys with long pants so you must think about what little boys and engineers, like.

Where did you want to cruise to? I would suggest your first one be through the Panama Canal. You can lure him with the promise of seeing the engineering feats there and he can watch the locks and the ship going up, up and over. Then, of course, on his economic and guzzling side you might remind him that the dining on the ships is 24/7 and he can eat to his heart’s content and not worry about how much the sushi costs.